Seriously. If you want a mind-freezing, watching paint dry, drool inducing (not in a good way, more like the wet spot on your pillow way) crappy final season of LOST, by all means list out the 100 frillion questions that MUST be answered or else.Or else what? You’ll stop watching? LOST won’t be back next year? You’re gonna go play ding-dong-ditch on Darlton’s porch?
Sure the story must end. However, I don’t want, nor do I possess a list of questions that MUST be answered. Think about it, do we really care about half the stuff on the 100 questions that must be answered or else post? Or the silly things in the laugh out loud funny Answer video. Picture in your mind how that would play out in the final 18 hours of television. Then see how quickly you’ll find out how very intriguing Simon staring down Kara’s blouse will become.
For those that can’t do the mental imaging, let’s try math. 18X42= 756 minutes Divide that by 100 questions then go down that list and imagine an average of 7.5 minutes of air time devoted to each of these questions. If that doesn’t make you an Ellen fan-girl, or make you flip channels over to NCIS: Lost Angeles or heaven forbid Melrose Place. Then you certainly deserve to be cast in carbonite and sent to face Jabba the hut for endeavoring to ruin the mysteries of LOST.
Consider:
- Did Star Trek devote any time to the evolution of Tribbles?
- Did Jaws ever describe how the Great White shart developed a hankering for nude bathers?
- Did Indiana Jones delve into how ___enter the relic was able to survive time?
- Did J.R.R. Tolkien describe the history of the Elves, Orcs, Hobbits (okay, maybe that’s a bad example)
- Did the tesseract in Wrinkle in Time get nailed down into a good explanation?
- Did George Lucas ever explain how the force works? (okay, yeah he did… do you now get the picture?)
I want the story to be told, not a laundry list of questions answered. On my reading that’s what Carlton and Damon have been saying since ComicCon. They’re focusing on the story they set out to tell, the ending they’ve always known. The questions that some of us obsess over are often the product of some of the production of television shows, not the product of the story the writers are trying to tell.
So as the season is about a week away, I’m gonna clear my mind, chalk up my questions to my overactive imagination, and get ready to read/see/listen to this last chapter of a really awesome show. I can’t wait to see how it ends.
